Monday, November 26, 2012

Oh Thanksgiving Dinner, You Fickle Mistress

I'm feeling a bit nostalgic, so I would like to recount to you the horror and hilarity that was Mine and J's first Thanksgiving together. 

It was a mere three years ago.  We work in Hospitality, so our thanksgiving dinner took place on our day off, the day before the actual holiday.  the place we work at gives out free turkeys, so we had a ten pound bird, stuffing, potatoes and broccoli.  More than enough to feed just the two of us right?  Perhaps, but nearly none of it actually ended up getting eaten. 

So many things went so wrong with this dinner I cant even begin to tell you. 

Problem #1

J is crazy freaked out about leaving food out, to dethaw or otherwise, so we didn't even put put bird in the freezer when we got it, as it was frozen solid, we put it straight into the fridge.  The Monday before our fiascogiving I wanted to take it out of the fridge and put it in the sink.  Nope, he didn't want it out, bactieria and salmonella and if I tool it our of the fridge we were going to die.  So it stayed in the fridge. This resulted in it still being more than half frozen the night before we were to cook our bird. 

Google saved the day!  We looked up ways to expedite dethawing, and put the bird in the sink covered by room temperature water.  Overnight, to J's dismay.  Unfortunately even though our Turkey seemed to be dethawed, such was not the case, and we discovered that when, after cooking it was still completely raw, and partly frozen int he middle...

Problem #2

J was determined that even though I had cooked many a thanksgiving Turkey, he wanted to do it the way his Momma does.  So, that meant stuffing the bird with lemons and limes and oranges.  Which actually sounds quite delightful, if only our Turkey had cooked.  *Sigh* So my traditional sausage stuffing, that I always cook, in the bird, (Yeah, yeah I know salmonella blah, blah.  I've been eating this for years and I;m fine, get over it.)  would have to be made on the stove top and oven.  I looked up recipes for sausage stuffing and found one that had directions for cooking outside of the bird and went with that. 

The result:  Burned Bread and not entirely cooked sausage, and lots and lots of salt.  Yuck!

Problem #3

Instant Potatoes.  Hey, I love me some instant potatoes!  Really, we eat them a lot and its so easy for a regular weeknight!  But we now had no stuffing and no turkey, adding instant potatoes was like adding salt to the wound.

Problem #4

Gravy, J hates canned or jarred gravy (or anything really).  I endeavored to make some from scratch.  But oh yeah, uncooked turkey=salmonella and unsafe drippings.  So, no gravy.

Thankfully the broccoli and cheese came out good!  But I did cheat and buy that frozen, and I am an expert micowaver!  YAY! 

I cried and Laughed and J hugged me and reminded me that this is what memories are made of.  We have not attempted Thanksgiving since, but I will once we have a house, and I will be successful. 

This year I am tankful for all the wonderful things that life has brought, and being able to laugh at our amazing and terrible First Thanksgiving together.

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